“Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail, they are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.”
The coffee shop feels empty. It isn’t, but it feels empty. For the first time in 4 months I’m here alone.
Well not really alone, the Lord is with me. He is waiting with me, waiting for my friend who is in a dark place right now and has decided not to come today. I don’t’ know if she’ll ever return to our weekly prayer and study meeting. It’s become so precious to me, those times we spend together, talking about life, reading and studying the word, discussing everything from the doctrines of the Trinity and Election and predestination to angels and demons and the spirit world to God’s amazing love to the person of Jesus, who He was and is and why it matters. But it’s been far from an intellectual thing; neither of us is a scholar, though my friend has amazing insight at times. No, this has been about relationships – mine with her, mine with Jesus, hers with God as she seeks Truth.
The Lord is teaching me a lot about faithfulness. Several times my friend has said she wasn’t coming, but He kept drawing her here and I kept coming not knowing whether she’d be here or not. Not because I’m anything special, but because He wants me here. He placed her in my life and on my heart and nothing she can do can change that. I will keep coming to our coffee shop until He tells me otherwise. Jesus has been so faithful to me, always there when I needed Him, always available to talk to and pour my heart out and ask the hard questions when life is so difficult. How many times has He waited for me to come? How often did He desire to have our time together and I didn’t show? Was He sad or disappointed? Did He grieve over the sweet communion we could have had but didn’t because I decided not to show up? Did He weep at my apathy or hardness of heart?
All I know is when I came to Him He was there for me. Always. Never did He fail to show. That is the very least I can do for one of His precious creations who is struggling to come to know Him. I pray she remembers what we’ve learned together, that He loves her so much and wants a relationship with her. That He is patient, will not force her but neither will He give up on her. That His word is absolute Truth, whether we understand it all or whether we believe it. He will love her regardless of what she does, and He will rejoice when she surrenders her heart to His plan for her life.
In the meantime I will pray, trusting her to His care through other believers He has already placed in her path and who love her as I do with the love of Christ. And I’ll come to our favorite table in the back of the coffee shop, Bible open and prayer journal at the ready. Because He is faithful.